I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
