I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
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