No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
