i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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