Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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