I just cut my nipple shaving
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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