hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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