That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
