He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Randomize