Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
