I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize