I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize