I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
