If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
