marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
