Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
