Just fell off a train. Bad.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
