It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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