He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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