Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
