if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
