I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
He better not be in your backpack
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
