WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
