So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
