Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
