Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
