Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
