Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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