just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize