Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
