I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
sarcasm needs its own font
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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