sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize