bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I'm passing your future prison.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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