Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
