my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
