Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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