Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
