I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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