wat bout pragnant strippers??
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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