I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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