i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize