just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
