I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize
