Grow some girl-balls and come out already
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
