just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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