I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
