exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
