Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
