I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
