At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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