he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
